Handling Job Loss - Must Read Tips

When 44-year-old Dele lost his job just three weeks before Christmas, his first reaction was one of panic. He had worked in a construction company for 12 years and assumed that he had a stable job for many more years. Dele was his family’s main breadwinner although his wife worked part-time. They had two children under six and the usual rent and other bills to pay.

Job loss ranks as one of life’s most challenging events and it hurts at any point during the year, but during the season of “good will to all men,” it tends to have a much more devastating effect on people when it happens at such time of the year. Some of the issues involved include adjusting your finances, looking for a new job, and coping with the emotional and social impact of your new situation. But even if you failed to anticipate this sudden change in your circumstances, here are some practical steps to take with a clear positive outlook if such happens.

Don’t panic

When you think about all your bills and the monthly expenses you have to face without a steady income, it is easy to despair. Remain calm and do not rush into any major financial decisions whilst you assess your situation. Even if you are eligible, be cautious about dipping into your retirement savings account.

It would be much easier to deal with both financially and emotionally if you’d prepared for the worst by planning ahead with an emergency fund or insurance. The importance of an emergency fund becomes glaring in situations like this. Do you have any savings? How long will it last based on your monthly bills? If you have been able to set aside say six months of your income in a high yield money market account, you will be able to settle some of your bills and relieve some financial pressure while you look for a new job. But if you have always lived from month to month, this may not be an option.

What do your full entitlements amount to?

If you have no savings and is fortunate enough to receive severance pay or other benefits, use these as a bridge to get over the difficult period. Spend carefully, and do not use all of your entitlements to make large payments as you might have to live off that money for what could be an extended period of time. Don’t let such funds lure you into complacency – actively seek a new job.

Develop a new written budget to cover a period of say six months and longer based on your savings and any expected funds. How much will it cost to maintain your family, your home and lifestyle? Keep your family members fully in the picture so they too can adjust their expectations about what you can afford. Cut back on non-essential expenses. Naturally, your priority will be housing, food and utility bills. You will need to restrain yourself from adding on excessive expenses during the Christmas period.

Try to avoid taking on additional debt except for critically important expenses that cannot be delayed. Whilst more debt can temporarily disguise your true financial situation, it will only make things worse. If you are unable to fulfill your financial obligations, such as your mortgage or car loan, approach your lenders; it may be possible to negotiate new terms to adjust your payments for a limited period of time. It is better to approach them yourself rather than to fall behind with your payments. If you default on your home or vehicle loan, your bank will take steps to re-possess your property.

Stay socially connected

Some people feel embarrassed or inadequate after losing their job. Don’t withdraw and let negative feelings stop you from taking important steps; you need your network now more than ever before. Reach out to family, friends, ex-colleagues and your network and spread the word that you are in the job market. Your CV should be carefully updated and circulated. Use holiday social gatherings for networking where you might hear about new openings and connect with people who can help.

With the sheer number of people looking for jobs, you need to cast your net wide, and not just for the same type of job. Be practical and flexible and don’t be fixated on a specific role or job so you can increase your chances of finding work. Consider temporary or part time work that will generate income and give you the time and flexibility to attend job interviews and actively pursue a more permanent position. This might be a time to upgrade your skills, or go back to school which will all add to your resume. Your hobbies, talents and skills and other interests may be converted to a business as they offer serious possibilities for income.

Apart from the financial issues associated with job loss, there are usually emotional and personal aspects that are too often ignored. Whether yours was the only position that was cut, or an entire unit or department, the feelings caused by being laid off are largely the same regardless of the circumstance. Many people experience a loss of self-esteem, a sense of failure and even depression after retrenchment. But it’s important to take your next steps based on clear rational thought, devoid of emotion.

As difficult as this may sound, consider the loss of a job as an opportunity to re-evaluate your future and, potentially change your career or start a new business. Losing your present employment may well be the impetus, just what you need to take a fresh look at your life and re-define your goals. Often, it is times like this that propel people into greater things. Punch

Three teenagers, charged with killing boy, 17

A 22-year-old man  Afeez Salami, and three other teenagers, Akanbi (15), Salisu (17) and Ishola (17) (other names withheld), have been arraigned before an Ikeja Juvenile Court, Lagos, for alleged murder.

 The police said the four accused persons conspired together and stabbed a 17-year-old boy, Nwosor Osita, to death.

 It was alleged that Osita was accosted by the accused persons at about 10:30pm on October 8 on Safisi Street, Alagbado, Lagos State.

Osita was said to have provoked the accused persons for allegedly putting on a black face cap suspected to be the identity of a cult group – Black Axe.

                                                            READ THE FULL STORY

Why Nigerian family businesses fail

When it looked like his two sons-in-law were going to become redundant and there was a threatening possibility that they would not be able to take good care of his daughters and grandchildren, an American grandfather called the young men, counselled the first to start making soap; the second, he encouraged to start making candles. This timely family discussion has blossomed into the business behemoth now known as Procter & Gamble, with tentacles all over the world, producing more than 300 Fast Moving Consumer Products including detergents, soaps and toothpaste. This business has become so successful that, the soap opera genre, the popular television entertainment, derived its name from the fact that soap maker, Proctor & Gamble, sponsored many of their early episodes. I once read a thriller many years ago, and so may not be very faithful in the recall of the details, but here is how it goes: A Swiss patriarch who had a global vision for his business and for his family, sent one son to Canada, to become a Member of Parliament, and another to London, to become an investment banker. He retained the third one in Switzerland to run the family pharmaceutical company. With determined efforts, the pharmaceutical company became highly successful. While the investment banker dreamt up new businesses, the manager of the cash-cow pharmaceutical business provided the funding, and the Member of Parliament in Canada gave necessary legal and political coverage wherever needed. In the end, they grew a global conglomerate. This is a classic display of vision and ability to work it out. Few Nigerian businessmen have such a vision, and when they do, they lack the know-how or follow-through.

Of a truth, not all Nigerian family businesses fail. There is a highly visible and successful family bank in contemporary Nigeria, whose Managing Director is the son of the founder. The bank decided to be even more successful simply because it was being derisively referred to as a family bank; and the founder rightfully deserves the ‘Sure Banker’ accolade with which his friends and admirers fondly describe him. To be sure, many Nigerian family businesses fail when still being managed by the founders: Some of the reasons for failure at this time may be that the founder’s vision does not go beyond fending for his family, or a simple lack of the knowledge of modern business methods necessary for building enduring businesses. Others have too many financial commitments — like too many wives, too many children, and too many social obligations — upon themselves, and it is usually the financial resources that could have been used to consolidate the company that is used to meet those private, personal commitments. Even there is no difference between the exchequer of the company and that of the founder. Most importantly, many of the business founders do not realise that they must establish a dynasty, or the sense of a dynasty, so that there could be a sense of commitment amongst their descendants, and thus ensure a long life for the business. The children usually become a disparate, un-coordinated mob.

But when the business is successfully passed down to the descendants, many factors work against its existence beyond a few years after the demise of their benefactor. Sometimes, the beneficiaries are not emotionally or technically prepared for the demands of the business; the founder may have failed to expose his children to the business, its method and its contacts. Many times, the business founders fail to build enduring structures for their businesses. So when they die, the children have no straws to hold on to; they start guessing, and with time, the whole thing collapses. But the biggest whammy is that the dead patriarchs usually leave what looks like a zoo of many wives, many children, and other dependents of different ages, spanning many generations, and with varied temperaments, caprices and values. This leads to so much unnecessary distractions and squabbles. The responsibilities of taking care of the younger members of the family who are either in school or learning some trade immediately (and rightly) falls on the resources of the company. Unemployed wives also begin to make demands on the estate. This genuine demands on the estate affects cash flow requirements of the company for future reinvestment or new investments.

Some of the beneficiaries, who have the opportunity to operate the companies, may be dishonest, incompetent or inept, and may therefore run the business aground. Others may divert part of the commonwealth to their private use. Even professional managers, who may be more competent, end up pilfering the sources of the unsuspecting beneficiaries. Sometimes, yet other children fail to appreciate that those who work with the company have a right to a livelihood, good and adequate remuneration for services. Look at the Queen of England, who, as a bona fide member of the Royal Family, is entitled to be queen. The moment she became Queen, only she enjoys the perks and privileges of the office of the Queen of England; while she ensures that other members of the Royal Family get their dues, she will not share her remuneration, unless she wishes to. She works for the money. That is the stuff that dynasties are made of. If you read Jane Austen’s book, ‘Pride and Prejudice,’ you will see how the Old English people solved the problem of inheritance and grew their family businesses into trans-nationals: The first son gets the entire inheritance, the second goes to the military, the third goes into ministry. Anyone after that number is encouraged to be a sailor, or otherwise, just travel the world! The girls? They marry into great wealth.

Because many of the business founders die intestate, leaving no Wills or even directives, about the future direction of the company, you get a series of conflicting and contradicting claims on the estate. While some of the children see the business as an ongoing concern or an asset that could bring future returns, others merely see it as an inventory of items to be disposed of for immediate gratifications. Where some of the children that are more astute with the protocols, observances and methods of the modern business environment begin to discuss in usually more arcane and complex terminologies, the others would think that somebody is putting them on.

There used to be a legendary Nigerian business mogul whose name was Henry Fajemirokun. These days, no one hears about his equally legendary Henry Stephens Group which included more than 20 companies in his lifetime. If you visit the previously venerated headquarters of the Group in Lagos, you will observe that the premises has been farmed out to Indian businessmen and others, and the only trace of the Henry Stephens Group is a half-portrait of the ‘Great Fajem’ sitting lonely on the floor, unattended to. But luckily, ‘Fajem’ was wise enough to partner foreign firms like Rank Xerox and Johnson Wax: Those companies have endured because they have structures, and will not succumb to family pressures and intrigues. They operate under best business practices, observances and protocols, unlike a sole-proprietorship enterprise that operates only under the whims of the individual proprietor. The verdict here is that Nigerian family businesses will succeed only if they are driven by a focused long-term vision, with well-established and firmly upheld structures.

Wife of conductor killed by policeman seeks justice

Kafayat Adeoye, whose bus conductor-husband, Kazeem, was shot dead by a trigger-happy policeman on November 7, 2012, at Tipper Garage, Ketu, Lagos, over N50 change, has called on police authorities to ensure that justice is done.

Kazeem was shot dead by a policeman attached to the Mopol 50, Abuja, Corporal Oluwakiyesi Adegboyega,

Kafayat and her husband had a seven-year-old son.

 PUNCH Metro tracked down Kazeem’s wife on Saturday; at the time of the incident, no one knew the deceased’s family.

Kafayat stated that she was more devastated because her husband was killed by a policeman who is paid to protect members of the public.

While Kazeem was struggling to make end meets in Lagos, his wife and son live in Osogbo, Osun State.

Kafayat said, “My husband has not seen his son in the last three years, not because he did not want to, but because it has been hard for me to bring him to Lagos.

“I was planning to bring my son to see his father soon. Kazeem sent money for his upkeep, asking each time when he would be able to see his son.”

 The son would only have an opportunity to see his father’s corpse on Friday, when his remains will be buried at his hometown in Iragbiji, Osun State.

 Like many innocent people, who had lost their lives as a result of police shootings in the past, the police authorities have neither explained what happened to Kazeem’s family nor apologise.

“I only heard from relations that he was killed by a policeman. Nobody has said anything; police authorities have not sent any message or requested our presence on the matter. My husband must not die in vain, justice must prevail,” Kafayat said.

The only sympathy the conductor’s wife got came from an association, in which her husband was a member – Bus Conductor Association of Nigeria- was N38,000 donation.

National President of BCAN, Mr. Adesola Israel, said Kazeem was a member of the Kosofe branch.

“The killing of Kazeem was barbaric. This association as a law-abiding group is calling on the Inspector- General of Police, Mr. Mohammed Abubakar, to ensure justice is done. The man who murdered Kazeem who left behind a wife, child and aged parents must not go unpunished,” he said.

Kazeem was shot in the head at close range.

Eyewitnesses had said there was an altercation between Kazeem and Adegboyega, who brought out his service pistol and shot the conductor dead.

The incident led to a riot that was later quelled by policemen. Thinking that the policeman was attached to the Alapere Police Division, bus conductors and commercial bus drivers had attempted to set fire to a nearby police station.

When contacted, Police Public Relations Officer in the state, Ngozi Braide, said she had no information on Adegboyega asking that she should be given time to find out the level of the investigation carried out.

She had said after the incident in November that Adegboyega was in custody of the State Criminal Investigation Department. But since then, nothing has been heard on the trigger-happy policeman. By punch.

Pastors in politics will liberate Nigeria’

National Vice Chairman (South-South), Action Congress of Nigeria, Pastor Osagie Ize-Iyamu, on Wednesday, called on clerics and other men of God to participate actively in politics.

Ize-Iyamu, who flayed clerics absence in politics, said their involvement would help to uplift the quality of governance in the country.

Speaking ahead of the conferment of an honourary doctorate degree on him and four other Nigerians by the Benson Idahosa University, the ACN chief said it was erroneous for clerics to shy away from governance.

He said, “For me, the more Christian people come into government, the more chances of Nigeria liberating itself from the darkness that we have seen now. But if we continue to leave politics because we think it is dirty, then we should be ready to continue to remain in the dark.

“The nation’s realistic growth and development must hinge on positive encouragement of decent men to hold public offices. There is an urgent need for improvement and therefore it is expedient that Christians participate actively in decent politics, devoid of corruption, thuggery and other forms of criminality, in order to improve the living standard of the people.” by punch

Man attempts suicide twice over eye problem

Taofeek Muraina never had it good as a child. His adulthood is not even better. This, perhaps, explains why the 40-year-old bricklayer thought it wise to die rather than being put to shame by friends and neighbors.

Twice this year, he has attempted suicide. The first time, PUNCH Metro learnt, was about five months ago, while the second one was on December 5.

On December 5, he had wanted to poison himself when a neighbor arrived on time and raised the alarm.

Muraina has been battling with an acute eye condition since when he was a child. As he grows, his condition worsens, making life unbearable for him.

Explaining reasons for attempting suicide, he said, “Life is unbearable for me. I was born with an eye problem. My wife, Tawa, left me and dumped our 10-year-old son with me. I learnt that she has got married to another man.

“I attempted to commit suicide by poisoning myself while my son and neighbors were not at home but my landlady got home while I was preparing the mixture.

His landlady, Mrs. Aminat Oseni, who said that Muraina had been her tenant for five years, explained that it was the second time that he attempted taking his own life.

Oseni said, “He (Muraina) is a friend to my son, Fatai, who is a welder. My son appealed to me that we should accommodate him when he came begging for accommodation.

“According to him, he was sent packing by his former landlord on the ground that the landlord’s family wanted to make use of the apartment. But he said the landlord only ejected him because of his eye problem.”

Muraina, whose left eyeball gorge from the socket, said, “This is causing acute pain for me. I have been living in pain since I was born. It became worse during the crisis within the National Union of Road Transport Workers three years ago at Moniya. I was hit in my eyes by an object and since then it had been worse.”

His relatives, according to him, came with a promise that they would help him but they never showed up again.

Muraina’s landlady said, “When they saw him they burst out crying. They said that they would take him to the hospital but they could not do so for lack of funds.”

A Mass Communication Student of Ahmadu Bello University, Zaria, Yusuf Oseni, said Muraina had not been having any medical attention as a result of poverty, adding, “That is why five months ago he attempted to commit suicide by hanging.

“Having tried all available means to help himself, he decided to take his own life. He has no money to treat himself in the hospital. He is alone with his problem. When he went to the University College Hospital, he was asked to pay N10m.

Muraina, a resident of Gunwin Akingbile, Moniya, Ibadan, Oyo State, said the excruciating pains he experienced on a daily basis had made life difficult for him.

He said, “I am a bricklayer and I mould blocks. People in the neighborhood always make jest of me. I take native treatment because I cannot afford the cost of surgery.

“I decided to end it all because I could not afford the cost of surgery and no one wishes to help me. With my condition, I still manage to work to feed myself and my son but people hate me.”  by punch.

Premature Pregnancy Love Making Threat

It's actually safe to have sex during pregnancy. Your man’s penis can't penetrate beyond your vagina, and the baby cannot tell what's going on. It is normal for your sex drive to change during pregnancy, though. Don't worry about this, but do talk about it with your partner

Sexual closeness and sex are safe during pregnancy, all the way to end. It cannot hurt the baby, who is not aware of what you are doing. Having orgasms does not cause you to go into labor or have a miscarriage. Orgasms can sometimes cause uterine contractions, though. In an otherwise-normal pregnancy, this poses no risk. However, if your pregnancy is at high risk for premature labor or delivery, it is not clear if orgasms that cause contractions may pose a risk; you should speak with your health-care provider.

One worry couples might have is that oral sex might bring up bacteria into the vagina.  This is really only a concern if your partner could have an STD.  If you are in a monogamous relationship and there are no risks of getting an STD from your partner, oral sex is really not much different than the exchange of fluids that happen during kissing.

As you move into the third trimester, however, you may find even simple movements—such as getting in and out of bed, bending forward, and even standing, walking, or sitting—to be very awkward and difficult. This physical clumsiness may keep you from enjoying sexual intercourse. On the other hand, increased pelvic congestion may arouse sexual desires, which are limned by orgasm. Your partner may also feel some restraints in enjoyment. He may be uncomfortable feeling the baby moving while he is making love to you. He may also initiate sex less frequently as he assumes a more protective role. Do not misinterpret this as rejection.